


Restart the Heart

by jeoseung



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Blood, Bondage, KakuHida Week 2019, M/M, Rough Sex, Swearing, some bones are broken., well it's kakuzu and hidan so
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2021-01-05 20:07:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21214334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jeoseung/pseuds/jeoseung
Summary: Kakuzu has lived many lifetimes without ever meeting his soulmates. As far as he's concerned, they're not worth his time or effort, and he has had no desire to meet them in his ninety years of skirting death. Unfortunately, fate is not so easily shaken.





	Restart the Heart

**Author's Note:**

> For kakuhidaweek 2019 for the prompt "Soulmates". There's an entire list of soulmate prompts I got this from, which you can check out if you go to the tumblr kakuhidaweek and view their prompts. This is a mixture of “You and your soulmate share injuries”, and “There is a point system to exchange information on your soulmate” (briefly) from the supplied list. 
> 
> This ignores the anime’s explanation of how Hidan was recruited, and takes place about a year before we actually see their canonical debut, hence Hidan’s slightly younger age. 
> 
> If you'd like to contact me, you may find my personal tumblr at thevsn. Hope you enjoy.

Kakuzu unceremoniously dumped his newest acquisition on the examination table. Nonplussed, the bounty collector leaned over the corpse, inspecting her face, looking under the eyelids, and feeling along her body. 

“How long is this going to take?” Kakuzu demanded, jaw twitching, after not even a minute had passed. 

The bounty collector didn’t even look up. “A few more minutes. Are you in a rush? You should be used to this process.” 

Kakuzu snarled under his breath but did not answer. Instead, he turned his back, pulled at his Akatsuki robe’s collar, and looked down at his chest. Across his body, clogging his stitches and clinging to his skin, was sticky, fresh blood. There were stab wounds all over his legs and torso, and most infuriatingly, a serious and fatal wound to the heart. 

The wounds themselves were a non-issue. They could be sewn shut and heal within a few days. What was maddening was the loss of _ another _ heart. It had been happening with aggravating frequency of late—especially within the past few years. Whoever was his deplorable soulmate in this generation had _ apparently _fancied himself a masochist. 

Surface wounds—and even serious injuries—Kakuzu could handle. He had gotten used to it over a century of life in a shinobi’s world. Even when he, himself, was not fighting, it was not uncommon for him to sustain painful wounds because of his soulmate at the time. And he had had quite a few in his time alive. It seemed fate wanted to condemn him to _ some _sort of attachment every generation. Kakuzu had stubbornly refused to seek such individuals out, regardless. 

Still, fate was determined to drive Kakuzu mad with its latest soulmate for him. The _ first _ time he had inexplicably lost a heart, he was _ irritated_, but no more so than he would have been for any other soulmate. The last three, for example, had suffered from heart injuries—whether it had been from battle or old age and disease—and therefore caused Kakuzu’s own to fail. Frankly, Kakuzu was relieved upon losing a heart at first. It meant his newest soulmate had saved him the trouble of a possible lifetime of unexplained injuries and possible lost organs. Perhaps he could have a few decades of peace before the next generation. He found a replacement heart without trouble. 

Then, unexpectedly, he lost another heart. And in the middle of a fight, no less, with exceptionally skilled bounties. Coupled with _ their _efforts, Kakuzu was forced to replace a total of three hearts. It was the closest to death he had come to in some time. 

He had almost been furious enough to cut off his own arm just to reflect the pain back on his soulmate—almost. Such injuries were unnecessary, impulsive, and _ stupid_. And, besides, after apparently losing his heart not once, but _ twice_, Kakuzu reasoned his soulmate must have been long dead. 

How wrong he was. 

“Alright,” said the bounty collector. Kakuzu shook off his reverie, readjusted his cloak, and turned around. “This is her, alright.” 

“As if I’ve ever brought you false bounties,” Kakuzu said. 

“You know the rules, Kakuzu-san,” the collector shrugged his shoulders as he wiped off his hands. Presently, he produced a steel briefcase and, without prompt, opened it to show the contents. Immediately, Kakuzu reached forward to count the bills. 

“And you now have 3.6 million points,” the collector told him in the meanwhile, drawing a pen over a booklet and displaying the new total. “I’m assuming you don’t want to use any this time either, Kakuzu-san?” 

Kakuzu’s fingers paused halfway through the stack of bills and eyed the number on the paper. Those points represented the points he had accrued over the years to have the right to look up information on a soulmate—and, particularly in the black market, information was as good as gold. Many bounty hunters utilized this service to not only learn information on a possible liability in a soulmate, but to find information on others close to them. 

Kakuzu had never made use of such points. He never had an interest in his soulmates, nor did he ever feel the occupational need to do so. He was typically assured he would outlive most of them. What was the point? 

But the empty cavity in his body representing his most recently lost heart rattled with an echo from his other four. This was getting ridiculous. What was stopping him from losing the other four of his hearts in his sleep, or in the middle of battle? For once, he was at the mercy of someone, and not only that, but he didn’t even know who it _ was_. 

He did not like it, and on top of it, it was affecting his work. At the very least, he should be able to find out who this person was and, if killing them was not an option, then Kakuzu could at least tie them up somewhere and let them wither and starve. 

“Name,” Kakuzu said, looking back at the bills to count. “Age. Gender. Image. Village of origin. Occupation. Location.” He set aside the single stack of bills and began counting the number of stacks inside the briefcase. 

“I—what?” the collector stammered out. 

“_Name_,” Kakuzu’s tone turned dangerous at repeating himself. He looked up and narrowed his eyes at the surprised collector. “_Age. Gender. Image. Village of origin. Occupation_. _ Location._” 

“I—yes, yes of course. Uh, this amount of specific information will cost a rather large amount—” 

“How much?” Kakuzu’s eyes thinned even further. 

“Well, especially when factoring in their current location and an image, it will total to nearly 1 million points.” 

It wasn’t money, but Kakuzu still felt his hearts drop at the price. It was almost a third of his total! 

_ Relax, _ he told himself. This was expendable currency, and anyway, this information was necessary. As soon as this individual was found and dealt with, he would have no need to spend points again. 

“Do it,” Kakuzu snapped before he could change his mind and returned to tallying the stacks in the briefcase. 

A few minutes later, the collector returned with a sheet of paper. Kakuzu, on his part, had counted and multiplied the total in the briefcase and determined it was the agreed upon amount. He shut it and took it in one hand as the collector approached. Wordlessly, he snatched the paper from the other man with his remaining hand. 

“He’s called Hidan,” said the collector as Kakuzu eyed the provided image of his soulmate. Immediately, he recognized the photo—from his own bingo book. The boy was worth at least 18 million. Kakuzu felt his lip curl. His impression of the boy now was about the same as when Kakuzu first saw him in the book. The boy looked insufferable just from his picture. He looked young—barely an adult—but aside from his arrogant air and unusually colored hair and eyes, he seemed unimpressive. 

“He’s 21,” the collector continued, confirming Hidan’s youth, “and is a shinobi from Yugakure.” 

“The demilitarized village,” Kakuzu commented aloud. He had seen a few villages that willingly demilitarized over his life. They were usually invaded and absorbed by other villages or countries within a few years. Something told him such peace did not sit well with the boy he was looking at. 

“Indeed. However, he’s currently an S-rank missing-nin. I’m sure you’ve seen him in the records.” 

Kakuzu snorted. Apparently he had wasted his points, and this only put him in a fouler mood. He could have just asked for a picture alone and determined most of this information himself just from Hidan’s page. He had not expected his soulmate to be a bounty entry in his own book the entire time. 

“As for his location,” said the collector just as Kakuzu reached the last line of the paper and felt himself pause, “he is quite close to here. He is outside the Amegakure—the Village Hidden by Rain.” 

Kakuzu frowned. It could be a coincidence, but he had lived too long to put much stock into mere circumstances. For Hidan to be so close to Akatsuki headquarters… 

“Fine,” Kakuzu said, crumpling the paper and pocketing it. “That will be all.”

Outside, it was raining. As was typical for this country. Kakuzu had just donned his broad bamboo Akatsuki hat when Leader called for his attention.

“Kakuzu,” he said to him in his low voice. Instinctually, Kakuzu’s head twitched to the side despite knowing no one would be there. 

“Are you finished with your latest business?” Pein asked telepathically. 

“Yes. I made a drop off on my way, and was about to head to headquarters.” 

“Very good,” Pein said. “Hurry along. We believe we have found a suitable partner for you.” 

Kakuzu could not hold back his snort. 

“Is something funny?” 

“No,” Kakuzu replied shortly. “Nothing at all.” 

“Then start walking. I will expect you no later than tomorrow at midday.” 

* * *

While he kept an eye out for Hidan on his way to headquarters—partially out of curiosity and partially for Hidan’s bounty—he wasted no more time than he had to. Still, even while stopping to pick up a replacement heart, Kakuzu was able to reach headquarters by the following morning, although with the overcast sky, it was hard to tell the exact time. Zetsu appeared at the entrance when Kakuzu arrived. 

“He’s upstairs,” Black Zetsu told him by way of greeting. 

“We can take that for you, Kakuzu,” White Zetsu offered, eyeing the briefcase. Kakuzu, while internally at loathe to give up money, willingly presented the briefcase to Zetsu to store. He then began to trek upstairs to meet Pein at the tower’s peak. 

There, Pein was perched, as usual, overlooking the city, although Kakuzu always had the impression his strange eyes were looking at something far beyond simple city skylines. Some distance away, dutifully at his side, was Konan. And next to her was— 

_ You must be kidding me. _

“Kakuzu,” Pein greeted him without turning. “I am happy to see you have returned safely.” 

Kakuzu grunted. He had little patience for false pleasantries, especially now. He glared daggers at the man who stood next to Konan, who seemed either oblivious or unconcerned by this. 

“He-ee-ey, so you’re Kakuzu, huh?” Hidan asked, broad mouth splitting into a wide and somewhat off-kilter grin—_Insane_, Kakuzu thought to himself with an impatient twitch. His pink eyes were wide and interested, and despite the rain outside, his silver hair was pushed back and styled immaculately. He was already wearing an Akatsuki cloak, although he was not wearing a shirt underneath and exposed his bare chest and a single necklace, and on his back was a large, unwieldy triple-bladed scythe that seemed poorly suited for any sort of reasonable combat. 

“Nice to meet you,” he winked playfully, and Kakuzu could feel his rage piquing. “I’m—” 

“I know who you are,” Kakuzu snarled and glared. Instead of intimidating him, however, this apparently only annoyed Hidan, whose grin dropped into a surly frown. 

“The fuck?” he snapped. “What’s _ your _problem, you old fuck?” 

“_You’re _my problem,” Kakuzu sneered, feeling his stitches pull at his cheeks. 

“What the fuck is _that _supposed to mean?” Hidan demanded, now glaring himself, hand reaching for his scythe. “You got some nerve talking shit to a holy man, you know? Jashin-sama has real special punishments for heathens like you—especially ones with absolutely fucked up eyes, by the fucking way. What’s up with that shit, anyway? Bet your face looks like shit too underneath that fucking dumbass mask, you absolute—” 

Quick as lightning, Kakuzu appeared in front of Hidan and seized his neck in a chokehold. At the same time, Kakuzu hardened his own neck and was satisfied to feel no bruising pain on himself. _ That _ was good to know—for future reference, obviously, for other soulmates, because _ Hidan _certainly wasn’t going to be his problem anymore. Kakuzu threw him into the stone wall. Seconds before Hidan’s impact, Kakuzu hardened his entire body and, despite Hidan’s howling and undoubtedly broken spine, he felt no injuries occur onto himself.

The dust settled, and the room was filled with silence once again. Kakuzu, aware he lost his temper and clearly killed what was intended to be his new partner in record time, turned to address Pein, prepared to defend himself. 

To his surprise, Pein continued to look outside, apparently unbothered by the sequence of events. 

For about another minute, the silence stretched on, with Kakuzu uncertainly glancing from Pein to Konan. Then, from his right, the rubble stirred. Kakuzu’s eyes widened just a fraction as he turned and saw Hidan pop out from the rocks, hair now ruffled and his body splattered with dust and blood, but unmistakably whole and unharmed. 

“Ah, holy _ shit_!” he snapped, crawling out of the rocks. “That fucking _ hurt_! The fuck’s your issue, you crazy bitch?”

_ Oh? _Kakuzu thought, eyes now narrowing. Suddenly, the multiple losses of hearts was starting to make sense. 

“As you can see, Kakuzu,” Pein finally spoke, turning his head a little to address them, “Hidan is an immortal. He cannot die. You can see why we believed he would be a suitable partner for you.” 

_ Fate is _ fucking _ with me. _Perhaps it was only expected after skirting death for 90 years. 

“I see,” Kakuzu said, impassively watching Hidan clumsily stumble onto his feet. While he did not believe anyone was _ truly _ immortal, the fact that he, himself, had felt Hidan get his heart stabbed multiple times surely convinced him that he at least possessed some very interesting jutsu. It was the first time that he had ever encountered such blatant demonstration of supposed immortality. Of course, he had investigated _ claims _ of such over the years, but never before had he seen such convincing evidence from an individual—much less _ felt it_. He mentally weighed the benefits of learning about this jutsu against dealing with Hidan’s apparently foul, rage-inducing mouth and the obvious fact that he was Kakuzu’s soulmate.

Vaguely, he wondered if Hidan knew they were soulmates as well. He did not seem particularly intelligent, but surely he would’ve felt Kakuzu himself lose his own hearts and injuries over the years. Would he, like Kakuzu, have looked up his strange soulmate that seemed to survive mortal wounds? 

“You must be fucking shitting me!” Hidan’s sharp voice cut through Kakuzu’s thoughts. “I’m not fucking partnering with this shit! He fucking threw me into a wall!” 

“And you lived,” Pein pointed out. 

“It _ hurt_, you insensitive _ fuck_,” Hidan sneered. Kakuzu felt himself roll his eyes. Somehow, the fact that Hidan lacked the basic respect to speak properly to Pein was incredibly predictable. 

“You don’t have a choice,” Pein said frankly. “Kakuzu is the only member without a partner, and you are now one of us. Akatsuki always travel in pairs. There is no backing out now.” 

“Then let me trade partners,” Hidan moodily crossed his arms. 

“Impossible,” Kakuzu snorted. 

“Yeah? Why’s that?” 

“I’d kill them.” This was not entirely accurate; he was certain Itachi would beat him in a battle. But besides the Sharingan, Kakuzu was sure he would best all the other members. 

“Oh, _ really_?” Hidan snorted, rolling his eyes. 

“Kakuzu killed his past four partners,” Pein supplied placidly. 

“Oh, really?” Hidan blinked, tone going from sarcastic to fascinated. He looked back at Kakuzu, eyes alight with something—something _ fanatic_. Kakuzu felt his stitches stir underneath that gaze. 

“Scared?” Kakuzu asked. 

“Ha!” Hidan laughed aloud, the moment gone. “You wish, old man!” 

Kakuzu’s eyes narrowed at this, but before he could say anything, Pein interrupted, “Hidan, the decision is final. You _ will _be partners with Kakuzu. Kakuzu, I expect no complaints from you, either.” Now he was fully turned, purple ringed eyes staring at them. 

Kakuzu inclined his head. “Understood.” 

Hidan clicked his tongue and glared at the ceiling, but he also said, “Yeah, okay, fine. Whatever.” 

“Good,” said Pein before turning around to look outside once more. “I believe you will find the partnership interesting regardless, Hidan. Kakuzu is, in a fashion, immortal himself. A pioneer of sorts.” 

“Oh, you are?” Hidan said, looking at Kakuzu with renewed interest. Kakuzu only snorted and looked away, even though he could feel Hidan’s eyes raking over him. Again, he felt his stitches itch underneath his skin. 

“You two are tasked with finding the Two-Tails. I expect results,” Pein ignored Hidan. “Now go.”

* * *

Hidan sidled up to Kakuzu as soon as they hit the road through the pouring rain, previous animosity apparently forgotten. The change in mood was sudden and grating. “So, you’re immortal too, huh?” 

“I am not immortal,” Kakuzu replied shortly. He could feel Hidan’s sleeve rustling against his own. 

“Oh, really?” Hidan said. “Pein doesn’t seem like the type of guy to lie, though. I mean, lie about something like _ that_.” When Kakuzu did not reply, he pressed, “Oh, come on. We’re partners now, right? How can we work together if we don’t know what we do? Hey, here’s an idea—I’ll perform a ritual for you, and you can see how Jashin-sama has blessed me, and then you can tell me all about—” 

“You called me old,” Kakuzu interrupted Hidan abruptly. Hidan started a little. During his entire rant, he had drifted closer and closer to Kakuzu, undeterred by his hostile aura. His chin was hovering dangerously close to Kakuzu’s shoulder. 

“Yeah, because you are,” Hidan snorted, dismissive, his reply a hair too late. _ Not used to lying. _A sad excuse of a ninja, then. “What? Did I offend you? Sure, my bad, my bad—for saying the truth, I guess—” 

“You called me old twice,” Kakuzu continued, now stopping and seizing the front of Hidan’s cloak. Kakuzu shoved him away at arm’s length, but kept a vice grip on Hidan’s clothes. Kakuzu’s eyes were narrowed and his mouth was downturned, although of course Hidan could not see underneath his mask. 

One of Hidan’s hands was already on Kakuzu’s wrist, and the other was gripping the hilt of his weapon, although he had not swung it yet. The hand on Kakuzu’s wrist was hanging on with surprising strength. Expected, Kakuzu supposed, if Hidan was used to swinging around such a ridiculous weapon. 

Despite Kakuzu’s grip, Hidan did not seem troubled; in fact, his expression was easy—almost eager. Kakuzu had the distinct impression Hidan could have dodged Kakuzu’s hand if he had wanted—which meant he willingly allowed himself to be caught by an opponent he presumably had no information about. _ Overconfident_. He supposed it was for good reason, if Hidan’s immortality was to be believed. 

Still, strength did not excuse foolishness. Inexplicably, he had the strong temptation to beat some respect into this boy. Perhaps it was simply from staring at his lazy smile. 

“Whoa, nice ink,” Hidan eyed the tattooed bands around Kakuzu’s arm. His eyes widened as he seemed to recognize their significance. “You get it while you were in there or when you got out? What’d you do?”

With a growl, Kakuzu backed Hidan up into a nearby stone wall and pressed in as close as their broad hats would allow. Hidan’s breath quickened, although Kakuzu was certain it was not from fear. This only served to fuel his frustration. 

“Answer the question,” Kakuzu ordered, rattling Hidan like a doll. Hidan only laughed and now moved both hands to Kakuzu’s wrist. 

“You haven’t asked me shit though,” Hidan pointed out lightly. Idly, a wandering finger picked at one of Kakuzu’s stitches on his arm. “You actually this pissed from me calling you old, old man?” 

Kakuzu increased pressure, making a crack in the wall behind Hidan and causing him to cry out. Distantly, Kakuzu felt his own back begin to bruise, but he disregarded this for now. Acknowledging this would only make him angrier. 

“You sling around insults but only used personal ones against me,” Kakuzu said, tone dangerously level. “And when I pointed this out, you hesitated.” 

“_Bullshit _—” 

“You _ hesitated_,” Kakuzu repeated, pressing harder against Hidan’s chest while simultaneously hardening his own. _ Don’t _ bullshit _ me, boy_. Kakuzu had already lived more than four of Hidan’s lifetimes. He was in no mood to entertain games. 

Hidan wheezed and choked, heart pounding against Kakuzu’s fist, but his eyes were still bright and excited. He was practically vibrating with vigor. 

“And you’re not even asking about _ those_.” Kakuzu indicated the stitching on his arm with a glance, where Hidan was still digging his fingernails into. “Tell me why.” 

“Haha,” Hidan gave a breathy laugh—or as much as he could through the pressure on his chest. His eyes rolled back the slightest amount, and his eyelids fluttered closed. “Ah, Jashin-sama—” 

“Shut the _fuck _up with your god!” Kakuzu yanked Hidan forward and back into the wall again, this time making sure to harden his own back. There was a sharp _crack_ as Hidan choked and spat out blood. 

“Jashin—_fuck! _ You fucking broke my rib you fucking _ lunatic_! Fuck!” Hidan squirmed a little in Kakuzu’s grip and spat out some more blood. “You punctured my fucking lung, you fucked up masked bitch—” 

“You’re immortal, aren’t you?” Kakuzu challenged, eyes narrowing. “You’ll get over it.” It sounded like an order. 

“Hm,” Hidan hummed thoughtfully, and despite a punctured lung, his hands were still on Kakuzu’s arm, practically caressing his stitches. He was grinning, lethal and sharp as a razor, blood trickling over his lip. Kakuzu had half a mind to undo his stitches and stab them through Hidan’s neck, see how much he liked them then—but then he wouldn’t be able to talk.

Kakuzu steadily increased pressure on Hidan’s chest, but despite this, Hidan was silent for some time, evidently content to grin and scratch at Kakuzu’s skin. For a moment, Kakuzu wondered if Hidan was faking feeling pain while they were meeting Pein, for any other man would have begged for release at this point. But, just as he was doubting this, Hidan threw his head back against the wall and began murmuring to himself, eyes closed and smile broad. Kakuzu caught the words “Jashin”, “sacrifice”, “blessings”, and “pain”. 

_ The lunatic was enjoying this. _ Kakuzu suspected as much, but confirming it only infuriated him. Abruptly, Kakuzu shook off Hidan’s hands and released his cloak. Immediately, Hidan’s head snapped down, cutting off his own prayers, expression askance and practically disappointed, before Kakuzu now gripped Hidan’s bare neck and squeezed. This time, Kakuzu hardened his entire body. He had a feeling if he did not have a mind to do it now, he would forget to if he flew into a rage against Hidan later. 

Gleefully, Hidan licked the blood and sweat off his lips and ran his hands over Kakuzu’s now hardened skin. He even leaned back to expose his pale neck further before he tapped Kakuzu’s hand on his throat cheerily. Understanding the request, Kakuzu relented the pressure by a fraction so Hidan could speak. 

“How about a trade?” Hidan suggested hoarsely, and his hand, fast as a snake, darted forward and scrabbled his fingers at Kakuzu’s mask before Kakuzu jerked away. “I tell you all about myself and all I know, and all _ you _ have to do is show me what’s under the mask!” Hidan’s eyes were nothing less than hungry as he met Kakuzu’s eyes. It took all of Kakuzu’s self-control to keep from his threads from rising out of his throat to puncture Hidan. At the same time, a heat burned somewhere in his gut, and he flexed his grip a little on Hidan’s soft throat. The killer in him wanted to strangle that throat. Something _ more _ wanted to tear it open with his teeth. When Kakuzu looked back up, he could tell Hidan could sense his instinct. His bright eyes were half challenging and half _ begging _ him. 

Kakuzu did not like that he was reacting this way. It signified a loss of control—something he had not struggled with for many, many years. Yet, here was a single crazed child at his total mercy still managing to affect his reactions. The very fact that Hidan was taunting him was all the confirmation Kakuzu needed, frankly. He should let Hidan go right now, go on with the assigned mission, perhaps figure out a loophole to Hidan’s supposed immortality, and if that did not work out, complete the work for the Akatsuki and move on. In a few decades, Hidan would no longer be his problem. 

Abruptly, as if splashed with cold water, Kakuzu took his hand back and allowed Hidan to collapse onto the wet ground. Hidan caught himself before his face hit the mud. He coughed and gasped for air on all fours while clutching his side. Right, his rib. Kakuzu could not say he felt much pity for the boy. 

“Get up,” Kakuzu ordered. “There are bounties I want to collect along the way.” 

“What—that’s it?” Hidan demanded. His voice was hoarse, but only barely. He was already healing. Kakuzu had to admit his regeneration speed was impressive. Idly, he wondered what abilities he could adopt from Hidan’s heart. 

“What’s it?” Kakuzu asked, hands once again at his sides and his skin unhardened, looking down at Hidan in the mud as if nothing had just occurred. 

“Fuck you!” Hidan snapped and scrambled to his feet, cloak soaked with mud and chin still stained with blood. This time, he really did draw his scythe, and he pointed it accusingly at Kakuzu. “What’s with that half-assed commitment? That sort of indecision is a sin, you know! And the only way to repent is to die!” 

“For fuck’s sake,” Kakuzu sneered, wholly unimpressed by a slopping wet and dirtied young man swinging a glorified farmer’s tool in his face. “I already told you to shut up about your supposed god.” 

“There’s nothing _ supposed _about him!” Hidan shouted. “Jashin-sama has blessed me with immortality, and I—” 

“Enough,” Kakuzu cut him off. “I couldn’t give a damn about your Jashin or any other gods that roam this land.” 

“_Heathen_,” Hidan spat with somehow more disgust than any obscenity he had called Kakuzu so far. “Blasphemer! Infidel! All I wanted to do was look at my soulmate’s fucking _ face _, but such offenses against Jashin-sama can’t be—” 

Suddenly, Hidan was crashing through the stone wall he was just against. Presently, the building collapsed on top of him. It was not a tall building—only two stories—but it was still a significant mass of stone, cement, and metal falling on his already broken back. While Kakuzu could not feel his suffering through his hardened skin, he viciously hoped it was agonizing. 

After five minutes, Kakuzu’s reason caught up with his anger. His jaw twitched as he calmed himself with logic. While Hidan casually throwing out they were soulmates was no doubt infuriating, this only confirmed what Kakuzu already knew: that Hidan was aware of their connection. However, this information changed nothing. Hidan could not affect Kakuzu unless Kakuzu allowed him to. Their connection was nothing more than unfortunate circumstance—as distasteful as it was. But, as long as Kakuzu kept him at arm’s length, there should be no reason they should not be able to work as partners. 

Because partners they were, and partners they should stay. Even Kakuzu had to admit that killing his partners, while extremely satisfying, was inarguably inefficient. He tried to argue to allow himself to work alone, but was shot down on this front (if individuals like Kisame and Itachi could tolerate partnership for such a length of time, Pein argued, then surely this was no problem with a man with as much experience as Kakuzu). Therefore, any delays in the overarching plan, dips into the Akatsuki’s funds, and Kakuzu’s own loss of time to hunt bounties because of searches for new partners could only be blamed on Kakuzu. He may have a short temper, but he was not above logic. He had not lived this long simply by going on mindless rampages. 

Thus, even he had to relent that an apparent immortal was the ideal partner for him. While the extent of his immortality remained to be seen, it was clear the boy could at least recover from broken spines, strangulation, and pierced hearts. What about decapitation? Starvation? Freezing? Burning? Poisons? Illness? 

He dismissed these thoughts. For now, he deigned to dig out his fifth and, with luck, _ final _partner. Deftly, Kakuzu released his threads to shove aside the heavy boulders and rubble covering Hidan. 

“Fucking _ finally_!” Hidan shouted as soon as Kakuzu uncovered his face. His entire right side had been smashed underneath heavy debris. “What took you so fucking long? Fucking idiot Kakuzu—” 

“_Quiet_,” Kakuzu glared. “I’m doing you a favor. Do not make me rebury you.” 

Hidan eyed the black threads drifting in the air, forehead creased, but at last put on a glowing smile and said, “Ah, sorry Kakuzu-san. Thanks for helping me out…” 

* * *

Kakuzu hissed and dropped the body he was holding as a piercing pain erupted on his bicep. 

“Hidan!” Kakuzu snapped, turning to glare at the boy. He was standing in his ritual circle, skin black and white, eyes wide and crazed, and his mouth open and salivating. Protruding out of his upper arm was one of his retractable spears. Before him, with a yelp, the remaining living shinobi gripped his arm as blood began to stain his shirt. 

Hidan, either by will or by accident, ignored Kakuzu, took out the spear from his arm, and brought it down through his thigh. Hidan let out an appreciative moan while Kakuzu just managed to harden his skin so he remained unaffected. Then, he stalked over. 

“I thought I told you to _ warn me _ before you start your jutsu,” Kakuzu snarled as he felt blood trickling down his arm. He already began sewing up his own wound by the time he arrived at Hidan’s side. 

“Shut up, Kakuzu!” Hidan glared at him, eyes bloodshot and wild. “Don’t interrupt the ritual!” 

Kakuzu snorted his contempt and seized the handle of Hidan’s spear. Before Hidan could protest, Kakuzu ripped it from Hidan’s thigh and ran it straight through his heart. 

“Fuck!” Hidan cried out, looking down at the spear sticking out of his chest. “What the fuck, Kakuzu!” Feverishly, Hidan looked at the shinobi he was bound with, as if holding onto some hope the man was still alive, but of course he lay face down on the ground, dead. 

“Fuck!” Hidan shouted again, tearing out the spear and driving it into Kakuzu’s stomach in rage, although of course it only broke against his Earth Spear. “What sort of heathen interrupts a holy ritual? Jashin-sama will strike you down, I swear to you, if I don’t fucking get my hands on you first, you disrespecting, godless, piece of shit _ miser_!” 

“Shut up,” Kakuzu said, unimpressed. He observed Hidan’s entire ritual in full once, when he first demonstrated it for Kakuzu, and that one time was enough. It was long-winded, rapturous, and unnecessary; Hidan could have achieved the same effect by taking his ridiculous scythe and cutting off his opponent’s head, or even skipping to the end, where he stabbed himself in the heart. Instead, he decided to indulge in whatever pain-related fanaticisms he believed in and dragged it out. All Kakuzu gathered from it was he would be required to use his hardening technique for up to an hour at a time whenever Hidan used his curse, which only served to irritate him. 

“We’re leaving,” Kakuzu announced. 

“Fuck off,” Hidan sneered. “I still need to do my prayers—plus _ extra _ since _ you _decided to fuck with the ritual with your heathen hands!” 

Kakuzu snarled. Hidan only glared before lying down on the ground and closing his eyes, gripping his pendant and furrowing his brow. It seemed he really was more pissed than reverent for today’s prayers. 

Kakuzu considered picking Hidan up along with the bounty body before reflecting that, if he did, Hidan would only complain for the entire rest of today and tomorrow, until he found another suitable sacrifice—or perhaps multiple, as Kakuzu was sure interrupting his prayers would incur great sin on Hidan’s head. The boy’s rantings were starting to rub off on him. Jaw jumping, but deciding the trouble was not worth it, Kakuzu sat himself on a nearby tree stump and reviewed his bingo book. 

Hidan wasn’t joking about doing extra prayers. This time, the entire post-ritual process took 45 minutes all on its own. Kakuzu was beginning to reevaluate the cost-benefits of forcing Hidan to move after all when Hidan finally stirred. 

His skin was returning to normal, and as usual, it was covered with blood and dirt, but no other wounds or markings indicating he had been in conflict. Hidan idly raked his disheveled hair back as he sat up, then completely rose and shrugged on his cloak. 

“Finally,” Kakuzu said, shutting his book with a snap and rising. 

“Wouldn’t have taken so fucking long if you’d respect the ritual,” Hidan clicked his tongue. He pulled his scythe from where he stabbed it into the dirt as he continued, “Show some respect! You should be grateful Jashin-sama allowed you the grace to be soulmates with an immortal priest of Jashin!” 

Kakuzu snorted. “‘Grateful’ would not be my first choice of words.” 

“Shut the fuck up, Kakuzu!” Hidan waved his scythe accusingly. “I bring pain and death in the name of Jashin-sama, and all my sacrifices get to experience the will of Jashin-sama!” He pointed to his own heart as he continued, “Jashin-sama gave me the gift of experiencing his will over and over again!” 

“You mean _ dying_?” Kakuzu’s eyes narrowed with impatience. 

“And there’s _ you_, who can’t die—which you haven’t even fucking _ told _me why yet—”

“Seems unnecessary.” 

“—and you refuse to take part in Jashin-sama’s design!” Hidan finished, sounding genuinely frustrated. “You deconsecrate the ritual, blaspheme with your Earth Spear, and spew curses to Jashin-sama! You know how many Jashinists would _ kill _ to get a taste of what you have, you ungrateful, heretical _ prick_? Whatever fucking _ bullshit _ you have that makes you immortal is only by Jashin-sama's will, so _ show some appreciation_!” 

“You think my Earth Grudge Fear is a gift from your god?” Kakuzu’s expression turned disdainful underneath his mask. The mere suggestion infuriated him. It implied it was something given—something bestowed, something blessed upon him. He might not remember much from his early years, but the screams of his village elders and the excruciating pain of changing his body were still clearly seared into his mind, and they were all by _ his _ will, not by someone else’s—most certainly not some _ god’s_. 

“Not _ my _ god, _ the _god! How many fucking times do I have to tell you? Only Jashin-sama has the power to grant immortality—” 

“I am not immortal,” Kakuzu said emphatically—not for the first time. “And neither are you. Immortality is not real. No one is immortal.” 

Hidan made an enraged sound and swung his scythe to bury the blades deep in the earth again. “_I _am immortal! Jashin-sama blessed me to never die!” 

“You, by your own admission, can suffer from malnutrition,” Kakuzu replied impatiently. “Even if this was not true, your immortality is contingent on a variety of conditions: performing ceremonies, offering sacrifices, consuming blood. I’ve seen this sort of thing before and I have no doubt I’ll see it again long after you’ve died. There is no _ god_, Hidan, it’s just _ jutsu_—older, arcane, forbidden jutsu with unique requirements. That’s what your curse method is: a jutsu.” 

Hidan opened his mouth to retaliate, but Kakuzu cut him off. “Enough with your tantrum. We’re losing daylight. _ Move_.” 

Kakuzu picked up the body with a bounty and began walking. He did not look back, and neither did Hidan say anything, but eventually, he heard a scythe being pulled out of the ground and footsteps begin to follow after him.

* * *

Kakuzu gritted his teeth as his hearts returned to him. Despite having done it many times now, the pain was still sharp. Well, perhaps it was to be expected; his entire back, after all, was ripping itself open to accept his additional hearts. Perhaps he would never get used to it no matter how long he lived. 

A small price to pay, as far as he was concerned. He suffered through it before patching his skin back together, throwing on his cloak, and picking up his mask from where it fell onto the ground. As his hearts and their threads settled, he tasted blood at the back of his throat: metallic and sweet. Kakuzu licked his lips absentmindedly.

“Alright,” Kakuzu grunted to Hidan. He had forced him to sit tight while he took out this rogue shinobi 4-man squad. Usually, he was all too happy for Hidan to do all the work—it usually meant he could watch him get smacked around a little if the enemies were skilled enough—but all 4 of these individuals had bounties for a total of over 50 million, so not only were they skilled and needed to be dealt with quickly, but if even one of them were sliced beyond recognition, Kakuzu would have been _ very upset_. So in the back Hidan sat. He could get his sorry sacrifices from somewhere along the road. 

“It’s done,” Kakuzu said. “Let’s get going. Help me carry these.” Kakuzu lifted two bodies and hefted them over his shoulders before he noticed Hidan was not moving to collect the other two. 

“Hidan!” Kakuzu snapped, glaring, and turned around. To his frustration, Hidan had not moved to help. Instead, the little shit was staring at Kakuzu, one hand distractedly drifting over his bare chest. His mouth was half upturned in a savage smile, exposing incisors. There was splattered blood on his skin—from the fight, presumably. Kakuzu didn’t know why Hidan would hurt himself if not for a ritual. 

“_Hidan_,” Kakuzu snarled, his sneer stretching his mouth further open along the stitches along his cheeks. He stalked forward with two full shinobi thrown over his back, asking, “What’s wrong with you? Pick those two up!” And he better not even _ begin _to complain about how they were heavy; Kakuzu purposefully picked up the two largest shinobi for that very reason. 

At his approach, Hidan stepped forward two paces to meet Kakuzu. His eyes were darting all over Kakuzu, pausing on his chest, shoulders, and arms, but mostly raking from one ear to the other. Ah, Kakuzu had forgotten to put his mask back on. 

“Grow up,” Kakuzu snorted. The little shit transformed into a black-skinned reaper after eating others’ blood, and he was going to have the gall to be disgusted by Kakuzu’s face? Impatiently, Kakuzu set one body down and made to replace his hood and mask. “If you have time to stare, you have time to do your half of—”

Without warning, Hidan leapt at him, scythe and all, forcing Kakuzu to drop the second body and use both his hands to stop the weapon. He had learned quickly over the past few months that, while Hidan’s style was sloppy, simpleminded, and overly-direct, his brute strength and agility truly made him a formidable shinobi coupled with his curse jutsu. Without his hardening jutsu, Kakuzu and Hidan would be evenly matched in raw strength. 

As it was, the weight of both Hidan and his ridiculously heavy weapon forced a surprised Kakuzu against a tree. Notably, Hidan pinned Kakuzu using the handle of the weapon, not the blades, which were stuck deep in the next tree over.

“Hidan!” Kakuzu snapped, his hand the only thing stopping the scythe’s handle from outright strangling him. His expression darkened as Hidan leaned in.

“_Hidan_,” Kakuzu leaned as far back from him as the tree would allow. “_Let me go_.” This was a chance—an offer. An offer that allowed Hidan some opportunity to willingly let Kakuzu out instead of suffering the consequences after Kakuzu _ forced _himself out. 

“Shut up, Kakuzu,” Hidan retorted, although he did not look angry, just eager—like the first time they met, when Kakuzu pinned him against a wall. Hidan’s breathing was heavy once again, and his eyes were wild and predatory. Once again, Kakuzu’s stitches itched with anticipation. “Let me get a proper look.” 

“What?” 

“This is the first time I’m seeing you without a mask!” Hidan snapped. “You even wear that shit in your sleep like a fucking maniac.” Inexplicably, Hidan shivered, and Kakuzu could feel it against his own body. Kakuzu ferociously stifled the hot knots stirring in his abdomen. 

“That was the first time I’ve ever seen you really fucking _ fight_,” Hidan laughed breathlessly, leaning closer and licking his lips. “It was so fucking great! The way you threw those guys around—and those mask things! Were those your hearts? They were fucking _ awesome_. Fucking completely decimated their asses!” Hidan laughed again, jubilant. “If you weren’t such a fucking greedy piece of shit, you’d be such a _ great _ follower for Jashin-sama, Kakuzu! That _ absolute slaughter_! Except you finished it _ way _ too quickly; Jashin-sama decrees we should all enjoy our massacres. But, I mean, as a new follower you couldn’t be blamed for not knowing _ all _of the doctrines. I’m sure if you did your best Jashin-sama would be happy to—”

Kakuzu narrowed his eyes. “Again with your damned god. Is that what this is about? I’ve told you I’m not interested.” 

Hidan ignored him as he continued, “Or a great _ sacrifice_. Five fucking hearts! No wonder you’re still alive after all the fucking rituals I’d done! You could die _ five times_—five sacrifices for Jashin-sama. If I’d known, I would’ve killed you more often.” He sounded truly regretful as he studied Kakuzu’s face. This should have been offensive, if not threatening, but Hidan seemed to be meaning it as something more personal—more intimate. Kakuzu could already imagine Hidan lying on his back somewhere, crooning out prayers and slowly piercing his heart to experience Kakuzu's death everyday. His own hearts pounded unevenly at the prospect, although not from fear. 

They were practically nose to nose, and despite all logic telling him otherwise, Kakuzu remained still. He watched with careful, guarded eyes as Hidan came closer. One of his hands drifted from the scythe to the zipper of Kakuzu’s cloak. Slowly, he heard the zipper become undone. 

“Hidan,” Kakuzu said—a warning. 

“Mm,” Hidan hummed and shivered at the danger sharpening Kakuzu’s tone, but Kakuzu could tell he was not really listening. When the zipper was undone just past Kakuzu's collarbone, Hidan pushed closer. He pressed his chest against Kakuzu's (or as well as he could around the scythe) and lined up their legs against one another. With reverence, Hidan looked along Kakuzu's chest stitches before slowly reaching in with a hand and running a finger along the bumps. It took all of Kakuzu's willpower, coupled with focused breathing, to keep himself from shivering at the touch. His hearts, however, were continuing to beat at an unsteady pace. 

Hidan pressed against the stitching, then, and tried to wriggle a finger between the seams. Kakuzu hissed as a warning and pushed back a little. Hidan playfully retracted his hand. His expression was gleeful, laced with killing aura, and his breathing was heavy as he leaned his face closer. 

"Kakuzu," Hidan hummed his name this time, meditative, as if tasting it. His breath was warm against Kakuzu's exposed lip. The hand that had been trying to intrude inside his stitching went back onto his chest and drifted daringly lower, towards Kakuzu's abdomen. At the same time, Hidan tilted his head a little to drift his lips over Kakuzu's—before sticking out a tongue and running it along the entire length of Kakuzu's stitches on his cheek. 

With a snarl, Kakuzu finally rushed forward, dislodging the scythe as if it was a toy and sending Hidan flying towards the ground in the same movement. Before Hidan could have a moment to rise, Kakuzu was standing over him, one hardened foot pressing hard against the forehead protector against Hidan’s neck. He was positively livid—especially because his body was beginning to ache for something _ else_. 

“_Do not_,” Kakuzu seethed, looking absolutely demonic, “_ever do that_.” 

Hidan only let out a soundless laugh, eyes closed, chest heaving, and smile wide as Kakuzu pressed down. Kakuzu could clearly see Hidan’s erection through his trousers. With disgust, Kakuzu gave Hidan one mighty kick into a nearby tree, but spared him his life. He could not afford to wait for Hidan to revive and heal; the bodies still needed to be taken to a nearby dropoff. 

“Get a grip,” Kakuzu sneered.

“What the fuck!” Hidan snapped, sitting up with a hand on his head. “What the fuck’s your problem?” 

“You’re my problem. We’ve been over this.” Kakuzu redid the zipper on his cloak and pulled his mask and hood back into place. He swore Hidan was practically sulking. 

“Didn’t seem like you were complaining a second ago.” 

Kakuzu wasn’t even going to dignify that with a response. 

“What? You were fucking into it! What’s the big fucking deal?” 

Hidan was met with silence again. 

“I mean, fuck, when I found out my soulmate or whatever was a fucking 90-year-old man, I thought Jashin-sama was punishing me,” Hidan said and stared at Kakuzu’s mask, where his mouth would be. Perhaps without even realizing it, Hidan licked his lips. Kakuzu felt tempted to punch him. “Turns out you’re fucking hot as shit and fucking crazy, so I figure who gives a fuck about fucking some decrepit asshole if he’s like that? Turns out I’m being fucking punished after all, because he’s a bitch that won’t stop being a pussy and fucking pound me already!” 

Kakuzu ignored most of this, including the part where Hidan essentially demanded Kakazu dominate him, and instead replied, “So you did look me up. I thought points were included in the material items you were supposed to give up in the name of your god.” 

Hidan looked offended. “Of course they are! I spent them or gave them all up before I joined the cult, you heathen! Don’t fucking try to lecture _ me _on the ways of Jashin, you fucking greedy piece of shit—fuck! Don’t fucking change the subject, you bastard! We’re talking about you and me being soulmates!” 

“What of it?” 

“So fucking _ fuck me, _ you absolute bitch!” 

“Entitlement is unattractive,” Kakuzu said flatly as he turned to collect the bodies he had previously dropped. He resolutely ignored the tingling running along his stitches and down towards his groin. 

“Oh, what, because you’ve gotten so fucking much, fuck face?” 

“Enough. Stop acting as if you’re unique. You’re not my first soulmate and you won’t be the last.” 

This took Hidan by surprise. “What? I’m not?” 

“Of course not,” Kakuzu snorted as he hefted the two bodies over his shoulders. “I’m 90 years old. Anyone with sense would reason I would have gotten my first soulmate when I was younger. Then, at the very least, you would be my second.” 

Hidan stared at him, processing this. “At least? How many have you had?” 

Kakuzu shrugged. “Don’t know.” He had a rough estimation, but he had never bothered counting. 

“You don’t _ know_?” 

“I did not make it my business to learn about all the lives I would outlive anyway. Get up and pick those two up,” Kakuzu added, but Hidan stubbornly remained on the ground. 

“Did you ever meet any of them? Did you ever sleep with any of them?” 

Kakuzu’s lips jerked in half a smile that he was grateful Hidan could not see. “Jealous?” 

“You did?” Hidan cried out.

“Pick those two up, I said.” 

“Fuck, Kakuzu, answer me!” 

“If you don’t shut up and do what you’re told, I’ll sew your mouth shut and leave you here.” 

“Kakuzu!” 

* * *

It had been some time since Kakuzu had been complimented on his looks. He wasn’t even sure when the last time was. Perhaps when he was still part of the Takigakure. He couldn’t remember. 

Mind, he had been complimented by whores and other people he had hired with money during the very rare times he did have sex over the years, but these were expected—part of service, essentially—and nothing to take seriously. Hidan, curiously, seemed genuine when he said Kakuzu was attractive. Yet, complimenting seemed sorely out of character for Hidan. Kakuzu considered Hidan may have simply been lying about it to get a rise out of him. It would certainly line up more with his habits. Then again, Hidan was insane. He might have seriously meant the compliment, but his state of mind hardly gave it weight. 

Still, Kakuzu caught himself scrutinizing himself in the mirror after his shower, eyeing the stitches that lined his face and body. With a snort, Kakuzu toweled off and dressed in the bathroom. 90 years of life and some blood crazed 20-year-old was getting to him. He must be getting senile. 

When he entered the room, he was welcomed with the sight of a very naked Hidan. 

“Hidan, what the _ Hell_!” Kakuzu snapped, immediately whipping his head around to glare at the wall. The damage was done, however; Hidan had been standing directly in front of the bathroom door, which meant Kakuzu got an eyeful of him. As he had already known and just visually confirmed, Hidan was well muscled across his entire body, and predictably, his skin was flawless across. For a pair of immortals, their bodily states were very different in this regard. If Kakuzu was a vainer man, perhaps he would be envious. As it was, Kakuzu was furious to find himself wondering how many ways he could bruise and cut that bare body before Hidan cried out for mercy. 

“Hidan, _ what _are you doing?” Kakuzu demanded at the wall. 

“What? I can’t dress how I want in my room?” 

“We are _ sharing _ the room, and you are obviously _ not _ dressed in _ any _ sort of fashion,” Kakuzu growled. “For fuck’s sake, Hidan, if you’re so interested in getting a lay, just go out and _ buy—_”

Hidan seized Kakuzu’s shirt and yanked him down so Hidan could press his lips against Kakuzu’s own through his mask. Even through the cloth, Kakuzu could feel Hidan’s tongue running against Kakuzu’s lip and drifting to the side to try and wriggle in between two stitches. Hidan pressed his body against Kakuzu’s and wasted no time trying to throw off his cloak and reaching for his chest. For a moment, Kakuzu was stunned into non-action. 

Hidan’s mouth was hot and greedy—and brazen. Hidan bit down on Kakuzu’s lip, apparently emboldened by the fact that Kakuzu did not throw him off immediately. Kakuzu kicked him across the entire room for this. 

“Enough,” Kakuzu said darkly. He approached Hidan and knelt beside him on the floor, but made a point to not put a hand on him. “I’ve been patient with you. I’ve listened to all of your ramblings, your ravings on your beloved Jashin, even sat through all your tedious rituals. But I swear to _ your Jashin _ that if you ever pull something like this again, I _ will _lash you to a tree and let you starve there for the rest of eternity—Akatsuki be damned.” 

“Ha!” Hidan barked out a laugh from the floor. “You’re lucky I like you, Kakuzu. I don’t let just anyone talk to me like that.” He ran his tongue along his bared teeth as he met Kakuzu’s eyes. He waggled his eyebrows. “Guess that’s why we’re soulmates.” 

Kakuzu made a disgusted sound. Before he could move, Hidan gripped the front of Kakuzu’s cloak and pulled down, clearly wanting the older man on top of him. Kakuzu stubbornly remained in place. 

“If you won’t sleep with me,” Hidan sighed a little, half-smiling, “at least _ die _with me.” Now he was rising to meet Kakuzu. Kakuzu allowed Hidan to pull himself up halfway before whipping his cloak out of Hidan’s hold, causing him to lose balance and fall back onto the floor. 

“Ow—! Oh, come on, Kakuzu! Just let me perform the ritual on you, just once! You’ll fucking love it, I swear!” 

“Haven’t you killed me enough?” Kakuzu said testily as he sat in his bed and pulled out a map. 

“Fuck off, that was by _ accident _ —come on, how was _ I _ supposed to know you would keep losing hearts? I didn’t even know you were alive until _ you _ lost two hearts in a day! That fucking hurt by the way. I thought you died after my first ritual—I mean, not that I even had any fucking indication you ever got hurt anyway...” 

This had never occurred to Kakuzu—likely because empathizing with Hidan rarely ever occurred to him. He supposed that, in the past couple of decades, he would not have suffered from any injuries—or, at least, no major ones that someone as inattentive as Hidan would notice appearing on his own body—because of his Earth Spear. If this was the case, then it was as if Hidan never had a soulmate all these years to suffer with until Kakuzu lost two of his own hearts in battle. 

If only Kakuzu had been so lucky. He now knew enough about Hidan now to map out a timeline in his head and determined that the first time he lost a heart because of him was likely around the time Hidan completed his first ritual to attain his immortality. Since then, he had been losing hearts at a rate almost faster than he could replace them. Between the pair of them, the number of homicides in the world likely tripled to quadrupled over the past few years. 

“Besides, the ceremony would be different,” Hidan insisted. He was breathless and excited as he gesticulated from the floor. “You just feel my injuries, but you don’t feel _ Jashin-sama_. You could experience him with me over and over, with all your hearts, if you did the ritual!” 

To both Hidan and Kakuzu’s surprise, Kakuzu did not immediately deny him. Kakuzu looked up from the map and met Hidan’s gaze. His crimson eyes, previously uncertain, now grew excited and hopeful like a child—if not tinged with bloodlust. Kakuzu’s own look was unreadable. 

It was true that Kakuzu was curious about what Hidan experienced during his rituals. His expressions alone seemed to imply there was some high of pleasure, at the very least, and this was as close to a claimed religious experience that Kakuzu had witnessed that seemed to have physical effects on the practitioner. After all, most religious followers found such pleasure upon dying and arriving in whatever afterlife they believed in—theoretically. Here was an opportunity to not only experience something allegedly spiritual, but experience _ death _ in a way Kakuzu had never experienced it before. 

However, to do so would require Kakuzu subject himself to the full mercy of Hidan and quite possibly lose all five of his hearts if he was not careful. There was no telling if Kakuzu would wake up in a timely manner after losing his heart in a jutsu like Hidan’s, after all. What was stopping Hidan from indulging in religious zeal and killing each of Kakuzu’s hearts in one ceremony if Kakuzu was not conscious to stop him? 

“No,” Kakuzu said flatly after some amount of time and returned to tracing out tomorrow’s route. 

“Oh, come on, Kakuzu!” Hidan wailed. Kakuzu might as well have kicked a puppy—if Hidan had any capacity for empathy for such creatures. As quick as it came, however, the expression was chased away and replaced with ferocious determination. Hidan rose and moved to stand at the side of Kakuzu’s bed. Pointedly, Kakuzu did not look at him. Hidan was still naked. 

“Is this about getting a new heart afterward?” Hidan asked. “I’ll get one for you—multiple, if you need them! I don’t fucking know. I mean, obviously I won’t kill all _ five _ of your hearts—no reason to waste all five when we can just keep replacing them and do it all over again together. You can even have one of your hearts watching me for all I fucking care. It can fucking electrocute me or burn me up or cut off my arm or whatever if I take too many hearts or some shit—not that it’ll have to, because I _ won’t_…” 

Hidan continued to ramble, and inexplicably, Kakuzu lowered his map to stare at his face. This was the most he had ever heard Hidan offer up contingencies or attempt to bargain for anything. And while their time together revealed to Kakuzu that Hidan was by no means stupid (just lackadaisical and dismissive), Kakuzu was under the impression Hidan did not have either the desire or the ability to do something like wonder why Kakuzu would not want to do something _ and _ provide solutions to it. 

“You’ve thought about this,” Kakuzu observed, tone frank, and cutting Hidan off in the middle of a triade. Hidan blinked before launching into a new speech. 

“Of course I’ve thought about this you condescending fuck! You think I’m fucking stupid or something, you absolute asshole? You fucking pull this shit all the time, acting like you’re the only one with a brain around here. Well, let me tell you something, Kakuzu: underestimating me is going to be your last mistake, and someday Jashin-sama will give me the power to—” 

“Why do you care?” 

“What?” 

“Why do you care?” Kakuzu repeated impatiently. “Why do you care so much about getting me to die with you, or sleep with you, or do anything more than just be partners and complete the mission?”

Askance, Hidan yelled at him, “I’m trying to fucking share shit with my fucking soulmate, you fuck! It’s what you’re supposed to fucking do!” 

“So you’re doing this just because I’m your soulmate?” Kakuzu snorted. “Is that all?” 

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?” 

“I’ve told you. I don’t even know how many soulmates I’ve had over the years. Clearly, the concept of soulmates is transient and arbitrary if one lives long enough. Therefore, investing time or effort into a soulmate simply because of their status as a soulmate is pointless. With that said, _ I _put stock in things with more permanence.” 

“Like _ money_?” Hidan stuck out his tongue in disgust. 

“Yes,” Kakuzu replied without missing a beat. 

“Okay,” Hidan hummed and shoved Kakuzu’s hands out of the way so he could sit on Kakuzu’s lap. 

“_Hidan_—” Kakuzu spat as Hidan straddled him, skillfully pinning him down with his legs and weight. Kakuzu would not be getting him off unless he broke a leg and quite literally threw Hidan. The fact that he had not done so already told him he was getting _ soft_. 

“Okay,” Hidan repeated breezily, smirk on his youthful face, “but how many of those soulmates have taken your hearts?” 

Kakuzu seized Hidan’s neck before he could get his face any closer. The other hand grappled Hidan’s wrists together before he could peel off Kakuzu’s mask. Kakuzu could not, however, stop Hidan from rolling his hips down into Kakuzu’s own. All he could do was stay perfectly still.

“Is _ that_,” Kakuzu said, voice dangerous and low as he stubbornly ignored Hidan’s motion, “what you consider a point in your _ favor_?” 

“I’ve killed you _ over _ and _ over,_” Hidan emphasized each with a grind, his unmistakable erection hard and proud against Kakuzu’s groin. Kakuzu tightened his hold on Hidan’s neck almost by instinct and felt all the soft tissue protest. He felt Hidan give a hard swallow before tilting his head back a little to show more skin. 

“How many people can say that, Kakuzu?” Hidan grinned. His hot breath was drifting onto Kakuzu’s hand. “I could kill you whenever I fucking want!” Hidan’s hands struggled to get out of Kakuzu’s. Kakuzu tightened his hold and hardened the skin in reply. Hidan shuddered with anticipation, eyes roaming from Kakuzu’s mask to his eyes to all over Kakuzu’s torso. He covered by his cloak, but Hidan was clearly fantasizing what was underneath. 

“So why shouldn’t I bury you somewhere and leave you to starve?” Kakuzu narrowed his eyes. His hearts were pounding, all five echoing erratically in his head. Hidan pressed his bare stomach against Kakuzu’s clothed one as best he could against Kakuzu’s resolute strength. 

“Because I don’t,” Hidan replied easily and breathlessly, voice straining under both Kakuzu’s pressure and his own arousal. Kakuzu, with Hidan so close, naked, and shamelessly humping him into the bed, could also feel his own erection against his trousers—and Hidan could, as well. His grin was triumphant, elated, savage, and starved all at once. 

“And _ you _don’t either,” Hidan’s eyes drooped a little. 

“I’ve done plenty to you.” 

“Mm—sure, breaking, bruising, killing. But no dismemberment, no burying, no tying, no starvation, no shit like that.” His smile flickered somewhere between glorious and crazed—as was suitable for Hidan. “Come on, _ Kakuzu_, you fucking heathen—I’m the only soulmate that can fucking handle you, and you know it. That’s why you keep me around.” 

The hand on Hidan’s neck tightened, but after a moment of tense silence, Kakuzu released his Earth Spear and let go of Hidan’s wrists. They were purple and black with bruises, but Hidan didn’t seem to notice. They would heal soon anyway. He wasted no time finding Kakuzu’s zipper and undoing his cloak to expose his broad chest. Kakuzu’s breathing, despite his now obvious arousal, was maddeningly steady, even as Hidan ran his fingers over Kakuzu’s chest and abdomen. Then, without warning, he dug his nails and drew blood along Kakuzu’s side. _ That _made Kakuzu hiss—although more out of irritation than pain—but Kakuzu only watched as Hidan brought now bloodied fingers to his own lips and licked each one off individually. As Kakuzu predicted, his skin did not transform. He required the symbol for that. 

Which meant he was simply doing that for his own pleasure. 

Eagerly, Hidan reached for Kakuzu’s mask and hood, but Kakuzu pushed against Hidan’s neck to force his entire body back and just out of reach of his mask. Hidan snarled a little and stubbornly maintained his hold on Kakuzu’s hips with his legs while grasping for Kakuzu’s mask. Kakuzu allowed this to go on for a while, watching Hidan’s face redden with both effort and asphyxiation, before swatting his hands aside and bringing Hidan’s face close once again to kiss it. 

It was through Kakuzu’s mask, and it was harsh and aggressive as Kakuzu continued to strangle Hidan, but Hidan returned it enthusiastically, biting through cloth and sucking on Kakuzu’s lip. It only lasted a few seconds, however, before Kakuzu reached down and snapped Hidan’s thigh bone. 

The crack sounded through the room in cadence with Hidan’s indignant howl. In the same instant, Kakuzu tossed Hidan to the side, on the remaining space on the bed, and rose. 

“Fucking _ Jashin_, Kakuzu!” Hidan spat as he clutched his leg and realigned the bone to accelerate the healing process. Luckily, the bone had not pierced the skin. “You could’ve just fucking _ asked _ you sadistic prick!” 

_ I’m aware_, Kakuzu thought with a scoff and turned his back to the bed. Hidan looked up to find Kakuzu wordlessly unzipping his cloak the rest of the way, shrugging it off, and folding it neatly atop Hidan’s nearby bed before starting on his trousers. These, too, he folded and placed. Then he reached for his mask and hood. Before Hidan could protest, Kakuzu took these off as well and put them on the nightstand. 

“Come _ on _ ,” Hidan frowned. “_I _ wanted to take those off.” Despite his tone, however, his eyes were flickering all over Kakuzu’s now naked body, drinking everything in. 

“Hidan,” Kakuzu looked down at him as his hair settled around his shoulders. “_Shut up_.” A cursory glance at Hidan’s leg confirmed it had healed already. 

Hidan sneered, defiant. “Fucking _ make me _ you old ass—” 

Deftly, Kakuzu let loose threads from his shoulders, taking hold of Hidan’s wrists, now once again pale and unmarked, to drag him to the middle of the bed. Once there, the threads drew up Hidan’s arms and pinned them above his head as Kakuzu joined him. 

Predictably, with Hidan’s obvious excitement, he was putting up quite a fuss. His face was full of anticipation, and his body was vibrating from adrenaline, but he struggled and kicked as Kakuzu attempted to slot himself between Hidan’s legs. Finally, fed up, Kakuzu snarled, and more threads from his chest caught Hidan’s ankles and spread him apart painfully wide and pinned him there. Still, Hidan writhed—Kakuzu could see Hidan’s body flexing all over as he tried to find some give in Kakuzu’s threads. 

“Stop _ squirming_,” Kakuzu ordered with a frown, pressing one hand on Hidan’s abdomen and forcing the small of his back to lay flat against the bed. Rather than resisting the touch, as Kakuzu predicted, Hidan arched into it, and despite himself, Kakuzu spread his fingers to feel the muscles there. They were hard and well-honed, if not unusually smooth. No scarring, of course. 

“You ever going to tell me where you got those?” Hidan asked, almost purring, and eyed the prison tattoos on Kakuzu’s forearm. The bed creaked as Kakuzu pressed harder, palm now bruising. 

“Don’t push your luck,” Kakuzu warned, leaning in. His hair fell forward, tickling Hidan’s cheeks. For a moment, Kakuzu studied Hidan’s face—sweaty, wide-eyed, with half a grin and half a sneer, and without any scars or imperfections. Defiant and submissive all at once. His usually well-kempt hair was in disarray on the pillows. Kakuzu idly wondered if any scars from before Hidan gained his immortality had been healed as well, or if he simply was unmarked when he did so. 

“You going to stare my boner away, old man, or you going to actually fuck me?” Hidan demanded at last. Kakuzu frowned as Hidan jerked upwards, seeking friction on his erection at risk of dislocating his own shoulders. Kakuzu did not find such desperation attractive or arousing. 

“We go at _ my pace_,” Kakuzu narrowed his eyes. Hidan was the one that wanted this so badly, so he could _ sit _ and _ wait _ now that Kakuzu deigned to give it to him. Hidan opened his mouth to say something, only for Kakuzu to catch his lower jaw in a hand to keep it open. “And if you say another word, I _ will _sew your mouth shut.” He held his mouth open for a moment longer before letting go. To his satisfaction, Hidan kept quiet. 

Still, despite what Kakuzu said, he was eager to get started as well. Here was Hidan, pinned down, naked, at his mercy, completely available for Kakuzu to do whatever he pleased with. He wondered how many others could claim they had seen Hidan the same.

Deftly, Kakuzu lifted Hidan by the ankles somewhat so he could slide his legs under Hidan’s hips while, at the same time, taking a hand, closing it around Hidan’s throat, and using Earth Spear around his own. He could feel Hidan shaking as Kakuzu slid a wandering hand along the inside of Hidan’s thigh before slipping down to move along his ass. While it was no surprise, it was still a marvel to feel such tough muscle underneath unblemished skin. It would almost be a shame that any markings would heal away so quickly. 

“Kaku—” Hidan almost snapped again, but at this, Kakuzu strangled him, cutting him off, and in one single, decisive thrust, entered him. 

Kakuzu felt Hidan seize around him with savage satisfaction, and Hidan’s throat convulsed under Kakuzu’s grip as he tried to cry out. Evidently, he had not expected Kakuzu to start without any foreplay. How unfortunate for him. The only thing Kakuzu was concerned about now was his own pleasure and his own release. After months of frustration, egging, flirtation, and challenges, if Kakuzu was going to be in this situation, he was going to make it _ count_. Besides: Hidan would just heal. 

In lieu of this, Kakuzu began thrusting at a brutal pace, focusing on the tightness and heat around him and leaning into it. His face was centimeters away from Hidan’s as he watched his flushed face adopt a similar expression of ecstasy when he performed his rituals: Hidan’s eyes were rolling, his tongue lolling, and his face flushed from pleasure and pain, if the purple bruises appearing on his neck were indicative of anything. Still, Hidan’s erection stood proud as his dick bounced, lewd, on his abdomen. Despite the threads holding his arms and legs in place, Hidan somehow found a way to push his ass into Kakuzu, no matter how slightly. 

Hidan’s masochistic pleasure in Kakuzu’s own greedy chase for his own only spurred Kakuzu to become more punishing. He dragged Hidan closer until he was practically bending Hidan over himself, no doubt straining his spine. He was tempted to do other things—his first thought was to pierce Hidan’s skin, maybe break a few bones—but decided the blood on his sheets would cost more than Kakuzu was willing to pay. This would be satisfactory. 

Kakuzu was nearing his climax when he felt Hidan struggling against the bindings on his wrists with new vigor. Kakuzu looked between the hair that was sticking to his face to find Hidan glaring at him, spitting out what Kakuzu was sure were very colorful demands from his otherwise closed throat. Well, the message was obvious enough, at least. 

For a moment, Kakuzu considered letting Hidan sit through Kakuzu’s climax without receiving any form of satisfaction himself. But, after admitting he was in a far better mood now and Hidan would likely complain relentlessly about it if he did not, Kakuzu obliged. Slowly, he released the threads on Hidan’s ankles and wrists and pressure on his neck. His wrists were bruised purple, like those on his neck, from how tightly they had been done to keep Hidan still. 

As soon as there was the slightest slack, Hidan seized Kakuzu by the hair and dragged him into a kiss—if one could call what Hidan was doing kissing. He was more biting around Kakuzu’s tongue and lip, forcing his tongue inside Kakuzu’s mouth, and plucking at stitches with his teeth. Kakuzu allowed this for a moment until he tasted blood. He snarled and gave a particularly rough thrust, making Hidan hiss and jerk backwards, but the damage was done: blood was dripping with saliva from a cut on his lip, and Hidan was greedily licking away what was left of it on his own mouth. 

“That’s going to stain,” Kakuzu observed aloud, tongue pressed against his wound, as he eyed where the blood was seeping into the covers. “That’s coming out of your share.” 

Hidan snarled and both pushed and pulled himself up so he was now sitting on Kakuzu’s lap. “You’re fucking talking about _ money_? _Now_?” he demanded, voice hoarse, heavy, and uneven. “Are you _ trying _to get me soft, Kakuzu?” 

Despite his words, Hidan was eagerly rolling his hips down, trying to take Kakuzu deeper. Kakuzu obliged, moving his hands to Hidan’s hips to press pull him closer. He was panting, sweat beading his brow, as he met Kakuzu’s pace. At the same time, Hidan used his newfound freedom to tangle his fingers in Kakuzu’s now available threads or run his hands along Kakuzu’s chest and arms. Unlike Hidan’s, Kakuzu’s own skin was a patchwork of old wounds, even in places without his stitches—a relic to 90 years of battles and wars. Hidan’s nails seemed to dig into all of them, as if wanting to replace them with wounds inflicted by him, and Kakuzu allowed it, even as he felt his skin break with shallow scratches. He even allowed Hidan to draw a wet tongue over the cut he made on Kakuzu’s lip, and raked a hand over Hidan’s back as Hidan bit into Kakuzu’s shoulder. 

It was when Hidan’s fingers began to drift inside Kakuzu’s stitching and into his body that Kakuzu wrenched Hidan away by his hair. Hidan looked absolutely feral, blood mixing with his own drool around his mouth and streaking across his cheek. He was caught red-handed, but he didn’t seem particularly troubled. Hidan’s fingers cheekily danced along Kakuzu’s seams as he grinned and leaned his head into Kakuzu’s grip, exposing his neck—begging for punishment. 

Kakuzu snorted. “Greedy,” he commented idly. 

“I shouldn’t be hearing that shit from _ you_, Kaku—” 

Kakuzu did not wait for Hidan to finish. Instead, Kakuzu released more threads than before, wrapping around his arms to pin them behind his back, wrapping around Hidan’s dick to deny his orgasm, and even using ones from his mouth to force Hidan’s open and stop it from moving. This was the first time Hidan had seen Kakuzu release any threads from his face, and from his expression and the way his dick was straining, he was enjoying it. Kakuzu ran a thumb along Hidan’s exposed Adam’s apple. Hidan shuddered and swallowed as he felt Kakuzu’s touch before his tongue darted along the threads lining the inside of his cheek. 

Instantly, the hand on Hidan’s neck darted to his mouth, where Kakuzu pressed a thumb against Hidan’s tongue and sank the threads further into his skin. Some began to draw blood. 

“Keep this _ still_,” Kakuzu said around the threads coming from his mouth and pressed on Hidan’s tongue emphatically. His voice was absolutely monstrous, bubbling up from the gut and coming out guttural. Hidan gave a heavy pant into Kakuzu’s palm, made a noise somewhere between a moan and a whimper, and insistently pushed his hips down. 

“Hn,” Kakuzu snorted and removed his thumb as saliva began slipping down his hand. He shook it off with disdain. Hidan only grinned as best he could against the restraints on his mouth. 

In reply, Kakuzu lowered Hidan onto the bed once again, ass in the air and threads still keeping Hidan punishingly still, readjusted himself, and resumed his previous harsh pace. 

Hidan’s back arched with a howl as Kakuzu began at this new angle. The way Hidan’s legs were trembling around his hips told him he was hitting the right spot, and Kakuzu used his hands to keep Hidan’s hips in place and pull Hidan even closer still. 

Despite the binds on him, Hidan was writhing underneath Kakuzu, and with his mouth wide open, his lewd cries carried out unbidden through the room. The more painful Kakuzu’s grip on his sides became, the more Hidan trembled, and when the threads around his limbs became numbing, his eyes rolled back. Kakuzu wondered what Hidan would be shouting if he was allowed to use his mouth. Probably something about his beloved Jashin-sama. 

The very thought infuriated Kakuzu. With Kakuzu inside him, denying him, bruising him, hurting him, and binding him, it should be _ Kakuzu’s _ name Hidan should be crying out in reverence. It was _ Kakuzu _that should be his god now, not some intangible fanaticism of some faraway cult. His nails dug into Hidan’s skin, drawing blood, as he thrusted into Hidan with renewed zeal. 

It was not long until Kakuzu felt his peak approaching, pooling somewhere deep in his gut and quickening his breath. Hidan seemed to sense it too, because he pressed his ass as much as he could against Kakuzu’s hips and held him there as Kakuzu continued to thrust—an invitation to finish inside him. Kakuzu would’ve snorted if he had the breath. As if he was going to wait for permission, anyway. 

In a burst of pleasure, Kakuzu came. His release filled Hidan, who shuddered as he felt it. He shook against Kakuzu’s threads as he took it all. Kakuzu gave a few more jerks into Hidan for good measure and stayed there for a moment, pressing against Hidan’s prostate, before pulling out and unceremoniously unwrapping his threads from Hidan, abruptly allowing him to fall onto the bed. 

Kakuzu knelt between Hidan’s legs and took him in. Hidan’s skin was laced with angry red and purple lines and was bleeding some places. He didn’t seem to mind. He was still trembling as Kakuzu wrapped a hand around Hidan’s erection. At his touch, Hidan’s eyes opened a sliver. Although his gaze was unfocused, the hungry smile was unmistakable. Wordlessly, Kakuzu began stroking along Hidan’s length. His pace, like when he was inside Hidan, was fast and impatient, and his grip was rough. Hidan only sighed, rolled his hips towards him, and gripped Kakuzu’s wrist hard, keeping him there. 

It didn’t take long for Hidan to come. When he did, his body gave one last shudder, and he threw a hand into his hair as he let out a moan. Kakuzu watched and stroked him through it as Hidan came onto his stomach. Once it was evident he was finished, Kakuzu rose and left for the bathroom. 

When he finished cleaning himself off and returned, Hidan was still lying in his and Kakuzu’s cum, arm thrown over his forehead. His chest was heaving and he was wearing a broad grin. Kakuzu noted much of the markings had given away to a pale pink already. 

Kakuzu picked up his clothes from the bed and began redressing, mask and all. Hidan lifted his arm and stared at him. 

“You’re still putting all that shit on?” Hidan asked incredulously. “Don’t know if you noticed, Kakuzu, but I just saw everything.” He grinned, wide and proud, as he seemed to realize what he just said. “_Everything_.” 

“Get ahold of yourself,” Kakuzu narrowed his eyes as he fastened his mask back into place. “I won’t be fighting naked if we’re ambushed.” 

Hidan began to splutter out a protest when Kakuzu turned off the lights and fell into what was Hidan’s bed. 

“Hey!” Hidan snapped. “That one’s mine, you fuck! I called it!” 

“I’m not sleeping in filth,” Kakuzu replied, already on his side under the sheets. 

“Well, what about _ me _?” 

“Clean yourself up and sleep on the floor for all I care,” Kakuzu snorted. “We leave as scheduled tomorrow.” 

Hidan threw out some explicatives that Kakuzu ignored before he eventually went to the bathroom to shower. Kakuzu was drifting to sleep when he felt Hidan throw himself onto the empty bed space next to him. 

“_Hidan_,” Kakuzu said, eyes still closed. 

“Fuck off, old man!” Hidan snapped. “I’m not sleeping on the fucking floor!” Kakuzu opened his eyes to find Hidan’s pale back to him and muttering to himself. “Fucking just fucked me in the ass and can’t even handle sharing a fucking bed, fucking prick.” 

After a moment, Kakuzu closed his eyes again. “Fine, do what you want. Just _ shut up_.” 

* * *

Some months later, Kakuzu found himself lying topless on the ground, Hidan lying close by inside his ritual circle, skin black and white. His expression was nothing short of jubilant as he pricked a spear into the skin above his heart. Kakuzu frowned and resisted the urge to use Earth Spear as he felt the skin on his chest break. 

“Oh, Jashin-sama, please accept this offering from your humble servant. We offer our suffering to you, Jashin-sama, who—” 

“Enough, Hidan,” Kakuzu snapped. “Get it over with before I change my mind!” How Hidan ever convinced him to do this was _ beyond _ him. He thought sex would be enough to waylay Hidan, but no matter how much they had, it seemed this was Hidan’s ultimate goal for some time; he hadn’t _ shut up _about it for months, now. At the time, it seemed an easy exchange for some peace and quiet. Now, Kakuzu wasn’t so sure. 

“Quiet, Kakuzu!” Hidan turned to him. “This has to be done properly, old man! I have to ask Jashin-sama for his blessings so all your hearts don’t fucking die all at once or some shit! Or you might really die! This isn’t exactly typical, you know! You want that shit?” 

Kakuzu’s jaw jumped, but he returned to looking at the sky and impatiently waited for Hidan to finish his rites. 

“Alright, I’m done,” said Hidan. Woodenly, Kakuzu turned his head to face him once again. 

“Remember, you’re getting me my replacement heart after this.” 

“Baby, I’ll replace _ all _your hearts after letting me do this,” Hidan winked. “I’ll even give you mine.” 

Kakuzu let the pet name slide in favor of emphasizing, “You are only taking _ one_.” 

“We’ll see,” Hidan grinned and readied the spear. 

“_Hidan_—” 

With a battle cry, Hidan buried the spear in his chest. Immediately, Kakuzu felt the searing, puncturing pain of losing a heart as one died in his body. He felt the familiar feelings of heart failure, of asphyxiation as oxygen was denied to his brain, and the fading of his senses and his steady paralyzation. Distantly, he could hear Hidan chanting something. 

Then, in the seconds before he lost all senses completely, Kakuzu felt—

“Kakuzu.” 

With effort, Kakuzu stirred. He blinked and surveyed the area around him. Still daytime. The sun had not moved much. He looked next to him. Hidan, skin now back to normal but still skewered to the ground, was watching him closely. 

“Kakuzu,” Hidan grinned, relieved and triumphant. “So? How was it? Did you greet Jashin-sama?” 

Kakuzu frowned, trying to describe what he felt. He could not remember much—as if he was grasping at water—but he was sure, just before he slipped from consciousness, he felt..._something_. Whether it was Jashin or something else, he couldn’t be sure, but just recalling it made his stitches itch, and inexplicably, he craved to experience this feeling once more. 

“Again,” Kakuzu ordered, offering his hand for Hidan to cut. Hidan’s grin grew larger. 

“Ha!” Hidan laughed. “I fucking knew it! Even a fucking greedy miser heathen like you can see the ways of Jashin-sama!” Hidan removed the stake from his heart and rolled to his side to reach for Kakuzu. 

“I didn’t see shit,” Kakuzu said as Hidan cut open his hand. He watched impassively as Hidan lifted Kakuzu’s hand to his mouth and pressed it there. He licked it and kissed the wound with reverence, lazily holding Kakuzu’s gaze. Kakuzu only glared. Slowly, Hidan’s skin turned black once again. 

“But you felt something, right?” Hidan said proudly, returning to his position on his back within the circle. “Jashin-sama’s will is fucking great, huh? Don’t worry, we can do this as much as you want. Fucking immortals, baby.” 

“For the last time, there is no such thing,” Kakuzu said as Hidan lifted the spear. 

“Ha!” barked Hidan. “Don’t worry baby, we only got eternity to figure it out.” 

“Stop calling me that.” 

“_Soulmates_, baby!” Hidan ignored him and whooped. 

“_Hidan_—” 

Hidan brought down the spear.


End file.
